The Path to Eden, episode 8: Knightfall

 Venno's audience were unusually quiet.  Rumours had been flying that this episode would be particularly terrifying.  He smiled.  They had no idea.

"The people gathered for an assembly.  With work almost complete on the temple and the sundial, it was time to start on some new projects.  Puzzle Paul was the first to speak up.  The Fellowship were bringing back artefacts, and he was sure that a museum to display them in was an excellent idea.  Despite a shout of 'No museum!' from the back of the crowd, the motion was approved.

Then Boss Johamed spoke up.  His lads wanted somewhere they could have a bit of fun.  They'd read all the holy books, and they wanted a tavern, like the Prancing Pony.  And furthermore, if they were going to have this museum, they were going to need to be ready for troublemakers showing up to steal them.  They needed a wrestling cage to practice fighting.

Scraggy Maggie was worried about the cannibals that the Fellowship had encountered.  She didn't think the fighting practice was enough.  They needed proper defences.  She hadn't wanted to keep living on sourdough starter, and she didn't want to get eaten either.  That seemed like quite enough to be going on with, and the assembly broke up so everyone could get to work.

Zippo decided he'd had quite enough of trying to work on the temple, and was going to do something he was good at.  He effortlessly interpreted the Ikea instruction manual and soon had the sundial set up and ready to go.

Silas headed for the tavern site, directing people in the proper layout of the building.  Not many people were actually listening to him.

Quin wanted to do some physical work rather than all this people stuff, and went to the temple.  Some solid hard work later, everything was in place and the temple was complete.  At last, Zippo's ears would be safe from Briktoria's anger.  She was now free to collect rocks for her slingshot.

Lenny was planning on working on the temple, but on finding that it was already finished, he headed for the tavern site instead.  There he found Silas directing people to run around like prancing ponies, not getting very far.  He pulled out his shovel and got to work.  By the time he finished, his shovel wasn't quite what it once was, but the tavern was close to completion.  Zippo got on the case, screwing it back together.

After seeing her artefact bow get broken, Katin was keen to ensure that that kind of thing didn't happen again.  She made her way to the site of the museum, much to Silas's disapproval, and got to work guiding the arrangement of exhibits.  Once she'd put in a decent amount of work, she headed over to the Seven Sisters cult to see how Eriel was getting on and when the hobbit was likely to arrive.  She was still getting sick a lot and sourdough starters were not agreeing with her.

Silas went to have an argument with Puzzle Paul on the subject of museums.  After a prolonged debate in which no agreement was reached, things were getting serious.  They both reached for their notebooks for an epic note-off.  At last, Silas slammed the door as he left, resolving to him him with the notebook next time.  But it wasn't long before he had another idea, and started putting up posters about how the museum was heretical and Puzzle Paul was lying to the community.

Meanwhile, Eriel was berating Katin for her ongoing failure to find a hospital.  Why hadn't she found one yet?  Maybe she could find a surgery as well?  Katin had no idea what that was.  Neither did Eriel.  But maybe if Katin could get her a hospital, she would stop blaming her for the death of Eriel's sister.

Katin ran away to cry.  Zippo, on his way to give Lenny his shovel back, spotted her and went to comfort her.  Together they went looking for Lenny, but they actually found Quin.  There was some disagreement over whether or not Ork was a good boy, and the hunt for Lenny resumed.

Lenny was up doing guard duty near the entrance, and had found some of Silas's posters.  He wasn't impressed.  They looked a bit heretical.  Silas explained his concerns, bringing up the recent damage to the temple, but Lenny pointed out that that was heretickal, with a k.  Silas still had a lot more say though, and the argument was still ongoing when suddenly night turned to day as the sky outside lit up.

Katin, Silas and Quin ran for the surface.  Silas dived for cover, only emerging once the light had died away.  Something had fallen from the sky - maybe it was the work of Sauron?  Perhaps his eye was passing across them?  Zippo thought it had landed somewhere beyond Alexandra's Tower.  Maybe they should go and investigate in the morning?

Katin's attention was drawn to the heretical posters on the wall.  Who had put them up?  Silas claimed not to have seen who put them up.  Ork sniffed the poster and Silas.  Katin told him he was a good boy, gave the poster a sniff herself, and turned to Silas.  Why was he putting up heretical posters?  Lenny took the poster down, and threatened that if he found any more, he would stuff them down Silas's trousers.

The next morning, Silas, Quin and Zippo were awoken by cheering and the voice of Briktoria.  She had a plan to take a group to the site where the Eye of Sauron had fallen, to destroy Mordor.  Eriel was amongst them as the group headed to the Ark's exit.  Zippo's best efforts did nothing to dissuade them.  The crowd soon awoke Katin, who went straight to look for Lenny.  They joined the effort to turn them back.  They didn't have a ring.  And there were supposed to be only nine of them.  It was in the holy book!  And they might have a hobbit with them but it was still inside Eriel, and the health and safety manual was quite clear about how pregant people shouldn't go out on expeditions.

Finally Briktoria was persuaded.  The Fellowship would go out, supplied with some waybread and water.  They headed out, with Silas surreptitiously dropping some fliers on the way out.

There was an unpleasant smell at Alexandra's Tower, coming from the place where they'd found the hanging bodies.  Katin advised everyone to stay away from that part and head for the higher parts of the building.  While Quin scouted to make sure there were no cannibals still lurking, Katin looked out over the area where the Eye of Sauron had fallen.  In the middle of the crater she could see something moving around, and the best, least rot-contaminated way to get there.

The big shiny thing required further investigation.  Was it an olyphant?  They needed a closer look.  Quin offered to sneak her way in and see what she could find.  The thing she found looked rather like a troll, but a metal troll instead of stone.  It looked like it was hunting or looking for something.  She didn't think Ork would be able to hurt it, and Katin agreed that arrows would just bounce off.  Quin was sure it wasn't friendly, so talking wasn't an option.  What were they going to do?

Silas wanted to get a look at it.  Quin offered to take him, on the condition that he was quiet.  Silas wasn't sure he could promise that.  Quin agreed, but said that if he wasn't quiet, he would be in front of her.  He decided it was worth it.

The creature he saw was unlike anything he had ever set eyes on before.  A huge monster, covered in metal.  He had no idea what it was, but perhaps talking to it would be helpful.  But even as he reached that conclusion, Quin and Katin were reaching a very different conclusion.

Katin had seen something like this before, in one of the pamphlets from the Box of Lost Prophecies.  It was called a knight, and was made by covering a person in lots of bits of metal.  They would then be used in fights.  They were very dangerous.  And Silas was about to try to talk to it.

Quin wasn't quite so sure what it was, but she recognised it as something dangerous.  She started trying to talk Silas out of getting any closer when Ork drew her attention to another person in the area.  A cannibal.  And then the creature spoke, in a strange unnatural voice.  'Mutants must die.'  And then a beam of light shot out of its arm and the cannibal was instantly vapourised.

Silas found that a very convincing argument, and the three of them quietly left.  If that thing came anywhere near the Ark, they were really going to need those defenses.  They discussed how it could be stopped.  Perhaps the knight was a Nazgul?  In which case they would need the right prophecy to know how to kill it.  Maybe it could be stopped by a river?  Or by some of Zippo's bombs?  One thing was certain: if Briktoria came here, she would die.

Katin took a look around at the local area on either side of the crater.  To the west she saw a building, covered with strange structures of rusty metal rings.  And to the south she saw what seemed to be an underground carriage that had burnt up after falling from the sky.

The first seemed like a good place to find useful items.  Katin had confirmed there were no threats here, with anything unpleasant having presumably been scared away by the Nazgul.  And so they set out once again, in search of the treasures that might lie within."

Always leave them wanting more.  Venno smiled again as he walked away.