Halcyon Calling, Episode 9: Costumes

Ariadne hadn't stopped at the spider bot. There was a car outside waiting for us. Really swanky inside, with leather seats and a mini bar. I was pretty thirsty and I wanted a Fanta but there wasn't any. There was some fizzy wine called Dom Perignon though, so I had that instead.

The car took us to the address Balae wanted to meet us at, which was some fancy tailor's shop on Saville Row. I was a bit confused, and it sounded like Balae was too, because she'd asked to meet Mrs Stodgely to ask her about an artist because Ariadne said it was important, but Mrs Stodgely thought we were there for a costume fitting. We did need costumes though, so that was alright.

Abeni was there too, and she wanted to know what happened and if we were OK. And I wasn't really, and I didn't want Billy or Balae to know how much it hurt, but I knew I had to tell her. She took me into a different room and had a look at me, and from the faces she was making it must have looked as bad as it felt. She got me some stuff to make it stop hurting, and some bandages to hold everything in the right place while I healed up.

She told me to remember that I'm not bulletproof, but she said I was turning into a hero, and knowing she was proud of me was as good as all that pain gel stuff. She was being careful not to hug me because it would have really hurt, but I did put my arms round her for a moment because I thought she'd like that.

Then it was back to sorting out costumes. I knew I wanted mine to be black and white, and after what Abeni said I thought some armour would be a good idea. The tailor was a bit odd, because all the clothes on display were boring men's suits, but he started bringing out all this leather and kevlar. I got some armoured leather trousers with stretchy bits where I need to bend, and a top with a kind of stylised version of the honey badger face I painted on my jacket on the front. And a new jacket with big spiky shoulders, and fingerless gloves to match. I asked if he could do boots with toes that open up, and he put together some with a trigger so they only open up when my claws come out. I hadn't thought about masks, which obviously we needed, but he got me a half mask and put some gel in my hair, and it all looked really cool.

Billy got a utility belt with his costume, and some stuff to help him with climbing so he wouldn't have to hang on to me all the time. Which is good, since we can do a lot more if I don't have to carry him. I am going to miss it though.

I didn't get much of a look at Balae's costume because she found out he had a room full of tech stuff and she was off looking around it. She looked really happy though. And we decided on our superhero team name. We're the seagulls, and our logo is a seagull eating a starfish.

Abeni took me home then, through the sewers since it was after curfew. I saw Tiffany waving at me when I got back, and I realised I hadn't been home in a few days. I told her I had to shower first but then I'd come and see her. I got a bit sweaty in the Asterion factory, and the sewers weren't great either.

Tiffany was really excited to see me, and I couldn't tell her most of what I'd been doing, but I did tell her about meeting the monkey and got her to find some photos of monkeys so we could find out what kind it was. We talked a bit about Star Cop and how we thought they were just making things up as they went along. She showed me some art pictures as well, and I recognised one. It was the same picture Mrs Stodgely had had on her phone at the tailor when Balae was asking about art. It was by someone called Pieter Bruegel.

It was called Big Fish Eat Little Fish, but in Tiffany's book it was also called There's Always A Bigger Fish. It was a very weird picture, because there were lots of fish that weren't real fish, like the flying one, and the one with legs, plus I thought the really big fish might actually be a whale. It seemed like it was important, but I couldn't figure it out just then. I thought perhaps it meant there was something stronger than the Asterions, which was what Ariadne wanted us to find out, but if that was what he wanted, why didn't he just say so instead of making us look at weird pictures? Anyway, Balae knew about it, and she's super smart, so I hoped she could work it out.

Tiffany's parents didn't get home until about ten, and she made me go before they got back, but I could still hear them through the walls. They were telling her off for being up past her bedtime, but it wasn't angry telling off, or even the kind when they say they're not angry, just disappointed. They just sounded like they really loved her and were glad to see her even though she was supposed to be asleep.

Billy had gone home to his dad, and Balae was with Castor and Pollux at the pub, but I was all alone in my flat. I shouldn't have listened to that conversation. And I shouldn't have got upset and punched the fridge either. I got a bit of an electric shock when my fist went through it but the worst part was I messed up the food that was left in there and got milk all over the floor.

I cleaned up the milk in the morning, but the fridge was still broken and I didn't know what you're supposed to do with an broken fridge. I tried calling Abeni, but she didn't answer. Then I remembered how amazing Balae is with technical stuff, so I sent her a text asking for help, but by then it was time for school to start so I didn't get an answer right away.

I met up with Billy so we could plan our attack on the factory. We needed a way in and out, breathing apparatus, and information on how to actually damage the place. The first seemed like the easiest. We could ask Carmilla if we could use her AV. Since she worked for Faustus and he was the one who gave us the job, I thought she'd agree. I got Billy to text her though. I wasn't sure she'd reply to me.

I'm not sure what Billy said in his text, but we ended up meeting her at the retro arcade and she was playing Dance Dance Revolution, and seemed kind of happy to see him right up until she noticed me. Billy got some drinks. I told him to get her diet coke as she didn't look like the kind of person who drinks sugar coke. I do, because I burn a lot of calories. Anyway, we sat down, and Billy told her we were there to talk business, and she didn't seem happy about that either. She said we could use the AV but she was the only one who was allowed to drive it. Which was fine with us. And we'd also need a Peacekeeper with us so that we wouldn't look conspicuous.

Then Billy got a bit weird and seemed to be trying to get rid of me, and I could see what was going on, so I pretended I was going to use the loo but hung around out of sight to see if I was right. So I got to see Billy invite Carmilla to the school disco, which I kind of wasn't surprised by, and I saw her say yes! Which I really didn't expect. I figured Faustus was using her to get Billy on board because boys get stupid around pretty girls like her, but maybe she did actually like him a tiny bit?

Billy looked pretty happy after that, and I was going to tease him about it, but somehow I just didn't want to. I did warn him to be careful if he wanted to kiss her because she didn't have a normal mouth, and he went bright red and I think I heard Nigel snickering. This disco is going to be really interesting.

We decided to pay Mrs Wilkins another visit. Calum the receptionist recognised us and wanted us to stop but I swore at him until he got out of my way. She'd got a new door to replace the one I smashed up and it looked a bit tougher this time. We went with our usual approach. Start quiet, and get loud if necessary. So we knocked and went in, and Mrs Wilkins threatened to call the Peacekeepers, but Billy had a word with her while I sized up all the furniture in the room and muttered about how that was a nice new door and it would be a shame if anything happened to it.

And she cracked. She gave us a USB drive that she said had everything we needed on it, but if anyone knew we had it, we would be dead. Maybe she still had a tiny bit of a conscience left. Maybe she just really liked her new door. Anyway, we had what we needed. That just left breathing apparatus and finding a Peacekeeper, but first we had to meet up with Balae.

She said she'd meet us at my flat after school so she could fix the fridge. I arrived with Billy, and tried to make him a cup of tea except I didn't have any milk. He wanted to know why I had space on both sides of the bed instead of pushing it against the wall. It's so that when I have nightmares I don't end up kicking holes in the walls. I told him about the kicking but not the nightmares. The walls are very thin here.

Balae arrived and she looked awful. I didn't know what was wrong, but it was definitely something bad. But she wanted to fix the fridge, and I thought doing some tech stuff might make her feel better, so I let her get on with it. The fridge works a bit too well now, but that's OK. The problem was that Balae still looked really upset.

So I got her to sit down on the bed, and asked her if school had been bad. And she told me they'd got her an Asterion teacher! So she'd had to pretend to not be as good at maths as she really is so that he would go away. And then she told me all this stuff about how hard she's finding it pretending to be human all the time, and I realised she must be exhausted, because it's hard enough for me to act normal and I am human. Well, mostly human. And I told her she didn't have to pretend to be human around me and Billy, but that didn't seem to be the right thing to say. So I listened some more and I tried to tell her how amazing she is, and Billy joined in, and what we said must have been right because she looked a lot happier and let me hug her, and I knew she was going to be OK.

ConDensed 2023

Once again covid has played havoc with my convention schedule, but having caught it a couple of weeks earlier this year, and with ConDensed being a week later, I was in a much better state for this year's convention. Lucky, since this time it was not a convenient drive from my house, but nearly three hours away. Fortunately, this time I had my husband with me.

This wasn't the original plan for ConDensed 2023. I'd hoped we'd be back at Billing Aquadrome. But there were already issues with the venue, and with the additional uncertainly of the place going into administration (not actually that unusual for the Aquadrome), I can see why we moved. The first attempt was another holiday park on the south coast, but not enough people booked to make it work. And so we moved to the Sea Cadets in Worthing, where we definitely did have enough people to make it work.

We arrived at the venue just in time for the opening brief, and then I introduced my husband to some friends, and then established nicknames due to all of them having the same first name. For the duration of the convention, my husband would be known as Mr Sue, a name he wears with pride.

Game 1: Eat the Reich

I'd seen the Kickstarter for Eat the Reich, and liked the aesthetic, but wasn't sure it was something I wanted to devote shelf space to. I was definitely up for giving it a try though, and soon five very different vampires crashed through the ceiling of a Parisian hotel and began our rampage across Paris in search of Hitler.

I liked the system. D6 dice pools, where 4-5 are success and 6 is critical success. The GM is also rolling, and you can use successes to counter the opponent's success. But you can also elect to take the hit and use your successes on something else, be that advancing your objectives, activating special abilities or drinking Nazi blood to increase your blood pool. Blood can be used to power other special abilities. There's an element of resource management involved, both with blood and with equipment. The latter gives you bonus dice on rolls, with the amount depending on circumstances, but have limited uses that have to be marked off. Fortunately there's no chance of running out of guns - at least there isn't if you're consistently killing Nazis.

And ultimately that's what the game's about. Killing Nazis until you've killed enough Nazis to get to Hitler, and then kill Hitler. Along the way we took on powerful opponents with scary technology and even worse magic. We visited iconic locations in 1940s Paris. We made creative use of our various vampire abilities. And we killed Hitler.

Everything that makes me not want to play vampires isn't here. The game has a clear aim and mechanics that support it. There's no angst, no politics, just a team of Nazi hunters doing their job and having some fun with it.

I don't know how well this would work for campaign play. It definitely feels like a game built for one-shots. But it's one hell of a one-shot.

Game 2: Cyberpunk Red

This was with the same GM as for Eat the Reich, and also the same GM as the Cyberpunk Red games I'd played at ConDucked. I picked up Selene the netrunner again and off we went to the Afterlife. Soon we were embroiled in another thrilling adventure featuring dubious corporate practices, gun fights and car chases. Once again, not having a medtech resulted in some interesting moments, although we did manage not to explode anyone.

Once again I am left thinking that I really need to run some more cyberpunk myself.

Game 3: Kult: Divinity Lost

Game slots at this ConDensed were rather different to what I'm used to. Instead of three 3-4 hours slots each day, there were two 6 hour slots (although effectively shorter as they overlapped meals, so there were long breaks while we all went out to the local takeaways.)

I took this as a good opportunity to run one of my longer Kult scenarios, The Farm. This typically takes me two sessions to run online, so I don't bring it out for conventions, but it's got some flexibility timewise and I reckoned I could fit it in.

Fortunately I had three players who all seemed to know what they were doing with Kult, as this scenario does require character creation at the start of the game. I gave them the brief - homeless people in modern day London - and they gave me a Criminal with a drug addiction and a shady past, a Doll who people just wouldn't leave alone, and a Broken dealing with mental health issues. A great bunch, and another new ending for this scenario.

Game 4: WEG Star Wars

I wasn't sure what I wanted to play on Sunday, given that the Rivers of London game had already filled up, but I had a look at the sheets when we arrived and figured I couldn't go too far wrong with Star Wars. I'd not played the West End Games version, beyond a single session back in 2003 or so about which I remember almost nothing, but it turned out to be simple enough to pick up.

We were humans, sent to support Boba Fett in an 'enemy of my enemy' kind of way, but got a bit sidetracked rescuing the survivors of a Tuskan raider attack and making friends with an astromech droid. This meant that by the time we made it to the final confrontation, most of the actual murdering was already done, but I did get to drive a scout walker for a bit, which was just as good.

I remain unchallenged in my opinion that Star Wars games are better when nobody's playing a Jedi.

Reflections

It was a small convention, but that suits me fine. Two slots a day instead of three made everything feel very relaxed, and also gave the option of some slightly longer games than usual. The venue was good - multiple rooms so we could spread out well. All in all, a very nice weekend, and I'd do it again.

Wicker Valley, episode 24: Surprises

Over fried chicken, fries and sides we discussed our next move. We needed to do something about Agnes. Both generally and specifically. We couldn't have her messing with our minds like that. Adam had a notification that his new set of books had arrived, so we could do some research on both shielding spells and on wards. But Michael had had a text from the fairy queen, and wanted to visit her again, and Elizabeth was very insistent that he shouldn't go alone. I happened to agree, but I wasn't sure why she was making such a big deal of it.

Anyway, Adam and Elizabeth went to hit the books, and I went with Robin and Michael to see the fairy queen. We ran through the rules since it was Robin's first visit. Don't eat or drink anything. Don't accept gifts. Don't tell them your real name. And don't fall asleep. The door to the fairy realm seemed to have ditched most of its special effects. Or maybe someone was just in a hurry and couldn't be bothered to impress us. Either way, we got in to see the queen with minimal fuss. Robin was careful about his name, and all in all it went pretty well.

I found that when I relaxed a bit, I felt less itchy and the queen's voice lost some of its intoxicating quality. I wasn't sure if that was good or bad. The queen asked me a strange question, about whether my transformation was permanent. I didn't know what she meant, and I didn't know if I should ask in case I said the wrong thing, but she said that I was becoming something different. And she's right. I've tried to ignore it, but between the teleporting, the armour and the strange glow, it must be pretty obvious to everyone.

We learned that the fae court was working with the Foundation, of all people. They even had one of their pet werewolves, which was really quite embarrassing to witness. It was clear we were running out of time. A supernatural war was brewing, and the only chance we had of avoiding it was getting rid of Agnes's ward. According to the queen, we all had the smell of Agnes on us. It was time to get back to the others and see what they'd found out.

Back at the junkyard, they'd got some useful info on dealing with the ward, but first we had the magical contamination we'd apparently picked up to deal with. Elizabeth could see it on all of us except Adam. We had a number of ideas for getting rid of it, and I think my idea of getting us into running water by visiting a water park was the best, but before I could book tickets, Toby the grotesque, not a gargoyle because he's not a drainpipe, showed up to tell me we had smelly bags on our shoulders.

We couldn't see or feel them, but Elizabeth's pet demon Nick could, and soon we were all cleaned up. Next up was a shielding spell, in case we ran into Agnes and needed to not immediately reveal all our plans. I attempted to help Elizabeth with the spell, and managed to set my own hair on fire this time, but fortunately she was fine without me.

I think being the chosen one is getting to Michael. We managed to talk briefly while Elizabeth was casting the spell, and he thought that it should have been me who was chosen and that someone just got it wrong due to patriarchy. I said that maybe they'd just been told to look for a redhead and got the wrong one. I don't believe that though.

Adam and Elizabeth's research had confirmed what we half suspected. The source of Agnes's ward was the tree. We were going to have to bring it down. We loaded up Vanessa with iron spikes, chainsaws and a flamethrower, and off we went.

The tree was in the middle of a playground, which was rather inconvenient. Toby was still hanging around, complaining that he couldn't even touch the thing. I found it was quite an effort to get near it, but that once I did my armour seemed to weaken the effect. I quickly backed off to avoid any sudden glowing in front of the children playing.

Elizabeth attempted to try a bit of lichcraft, I think, but that didn't go well. Her hand suddenly turned black, and the blackness began creeping up her arm. I had a sudden hunch about how to stop it, reached out to take hold of her arm, and tried to drive it back. Not all the way, but at least she still had all her fingers.

We donned some hi-vis jackets and began clearing the playground, claiming that the tree was dangerous. Which was true, after all. Adam got to work hammering iron spikes into the tree to weaken it, but I had other things to worry about. Michael was having a seizure. He didn't seem to be hurt, so I just did some regular first aid, but he didn't wake up when it ended. Elizabeth could see it was no normal seizure, but Agnes doing something to him. Elizabeth said that he needed a shock to wake him up and suggested that I should kiss him.

At which point I realised we were being shipped by our own teammate, but I couldn't think about that right then because Michael needed help. So in my mind I screamed at Agnes to get away from him, and I kissed him. And he woke up.

I think we were both a bit surprised, and must have said out loud that this wasn't how I'd imagined it happening, because Michael was surprised again that I'd imagined it. But while we were having this moment, Elizabeth and Robin were laying into the tree with ice magic and chainsaw, and it was about to come down. I kept hold of Michael and teleported us back to the van out of harm's way.

The tree crashed down. Adam shoved Robin out of its path and we regrouped at the van. I think we all knew what was coming. Agnes didn't waste any time. She was there in a moment, and for the first time she let her little old lady façade drop to show us the winged, clawed hellspawn beneath.

Halcyon Calling, Episode 8: Going Underground

The other were doing what we were supposed to be doing, which was sneaking back into the Gull and Switchblade without being noticed. Well, they weren't, as it turned out, as they were getting caught by Splinters, but I didn't know that yet. I was thinking about the compound, and Carmilla. There was another person who actually understood what I'd been through. We could have been friends. But she'd chosen to hate me instead. I didn't even know what to think about that, and I was still kind of zoned out when Splinters came out and talked me me. I don't really remember what she said, but she gave me a machete, and I think that means she likes me.

She still herded me inside to see Castor and Pollux with the others though. They weren't happy about us sneaking out, but it wasn't as bad as I expected. And they did explain a few things. Like how they used to be in a superhero team with Abeni and Mrs Stodgely and Faustus and Harold Winfield! That slimy politician who spends all his time kissing up to the Asterians used to be a superhero! Except they all did something that changed reality to prevent the destruction of the world? Something like that, anyway. It was late, and I was confused. They changed reality so the bad stuff didn't happen, and instead of a superhero team they were a punk band.

Except Faustus somehow still had some of his superhero powers, and maybe Harold Winfield wasn't quite as useless as he normally acts, since it sounds like he must be Ariadne because he's the other person who knows about that warehouse where we met Ariadne and Faustus.

So I could see why they didn't want us to work for Faustus, and I don't really want to work for Faustus either, but at the same time he wanted us to destroy the factory in Elizabeth Park and I really did want to do that. And I trusted Ariadne even less than I did before finding out who was behind all the nonsense, even if his spider bots are really cute and make Balae happy.

Then they let us have some more of the expensive alcohol, although by now it was starting to taste a bit watery, which both of them seemed to notice but pretended not to so I have no idea what that was all about. Anyway, it seemed like we weren't in any more trouble and they let us go to sleep.

Balae went to school in the morning but Billy wanted to ditch and check out the Asterian factory, and I'd caught up on my online learning programme so I went with him. We took the tube out to Stratford. There were people singing on the tube and I recognised it as the same song from the start of that awful musical that Castor and Pollux were listening to because it had really boring words which were just big numbers of minutes and something about love.

Then we got on the central line and there was a woman with a whole bunch of animal carriers, so I tried to keep really still and not be threatening because sometimes it seems like I scare animals just by existing. And I must have done well because she had a little monkey on her shoulder and it climbed over to me. I had some peanuts in my pockets as usual so I gave one to the monkey and he seemed to like it, and that made the woman with the carriers like me too. She said the monkey was called Puck, and gave me a card that said she was called Artemis and that we could visit.

Then we pulled into Stratford station and there were Asterian peacekeepers everywhere and they were doing some kind of security check on the way out. They were scanning everyone with a jellyfish kind of thing, and I thought whatever it was was likely to pick up Nigel. Billy found a staff lift that he reckoned would get us out of there and he was all for using Artemis and her animals as a distraction, but I liked her and her monkey. Besides, I didn't think Balae would ever forgive us if we lost the chance for her to meet a monkey.

So I gave Artemis the heads up, and I caused a distraction. I ripped up one of the benches from the platform and threw it, and in the chaos Artemis got her animals out and we got into the lift. We did some proper action movie shit climbing up cables and dodging Asterians and then we were out.

We climbed up onto some rooftops to get a better view, using cables to crawl between buildings. At least, I crawled while Billy hung onto me. Nigel said something about how Billy should figure out how to use him to learn to fly. Which would be cool. Except I'd miss the two of us climbing together like this, and I didn't mean to say that part out loud so I hope he didn't hear.

The last building didn't have anything to crawl over, and I could make the jump but not while carrying Billy. But I remembered some really old movie Abeni told me about where they had a problem like this, so I picked up Billy and threw him across the gap and then jumped across myself. The factory was as awful in real life as it looked on the TV. Clouds of pink smoke rising up from the chimneys and people being herded inside wearing breathing masks the same as the one we'd had to put on Mr Stodgely.

This wasn't going to be easy. The security was bad enough, and we'd probably not even be able to breathe inside. But we were getting ideas. This was Faustus's idea, after all, so the least he could do was get us some breathing masks. And Carmilla's AV was just like the ones the Asterians used so perhaps that would help us get past security.

I was feeling quite happy as we headed back to the tube. We had a plan, and providing Faustus came through with the gear it might actually work. But it all went wrong when we got down onto the train and suddenly we were surrounded by peacekeepers.

It was thanks to Balae that we got out of there. I never would have thought of called Ariadne after what we'd learned about him, but she figured out straight away that he could help. So that's how we ended up taking down two massive Asterians, wiping all the information they had on us from their computers, and following one of those spider bots out of there all without the alarm being raised.

I was in a ton of pain when we got out and struggling to breathe from where they hit me in the chest. But we were both alive and Billy was OK and that was what mattered. I'd heal up pretty soon, and we had a plan, although I think we both realised we needed disguises before we came back here again.

And after that, all I had to worry about was making sure Balae had a good time at the school disco.

Wicker Valley, episode 23: Intervention

It had been a long day, and I hadn't exactly had the best night's sleep, and it would have been nice to be able to go and get some rest before having to deal with Aunty Agnes again, but fate intervened when Michael had another vision. The Whisper Sisters, dead.

We didn't know where the sisters' home was, but Agnes did. Right next door to her. We were already too late though. When we got there Mary was in floods of tears. Robin was there too, back from whatever he'd been off doing for Agnes for the last few days.

We checked out the scene. Not that there was much to check out. Elizabeth picked up the lingering traces of fae spirits passing on. Robin stretched out his wolf nose for a sniff about, and Michael took hold of one sister's hand. That seemed to freak him out, enough to make him run for the door, but before I could go after him he ran into the arriving paramedic, who immediately started freaking out in turn at the sight of Robin.

I thought I was going to have to use the Voice of Temptation, but somehow I found something else within me. A few calm words about how we were friends of the deceased and staying with the bodies until they arrived, and attention was off Robin and nobody was panicking any more.

We finally decided we needed sleep before we tried to look into things any further, and agreed to meet up at the junk yard in the morning. Nobody had found anything useful beyond what Michael had seen - a vision of the sisters' hearts being washed out of their bodies by a tide of water. Horrible, but it was something. We were going to have to do some research. First though, there was the matter of Robin.

I didn't notice it at first, but the others did. I was talking about Agnes the way I normally do. She's nice, but as Terry Pratchett said, nice isn't the same as good, and when it comes down to it, she's the same hellspawn as me and Rusty. I like her but I don't trust her. And the others seem to be on the same page, with even Elizabeth having grasped that Rusty is bad news. Robin, on the other hand, was being overwhelmingly positive about Agnes in response to all my less enthusiastic comments, and Elizabeth quietly suggested a quick banishing rite.

We gathered up what we could in the way of supplies. You can do a lot with some sage and salt. Or you can, if your assistant doesn't set your hair on fire with the burning sage, and you don't completely fumble the salt and mess up your words. That took some explaining, and to make it worse we were getting messages from Agnes wanting to see us at the Wicker Stop.

I took the quick route. I landed myself in the basket room, which wasn't the best choice as it was locked. I should have gone with the toilets. But there I was, getting a big hug from Mary which I wasn't ready for, and a more cautious one from Agnes who seems to have figured out her timeline's version of me was a little more enthusiastic about hugs than I am.

Agnes wanted to know all about the business with the tooth fairy, and I was trying to hold back and not tell her too much, but somehow ended up spilling all about how they were going to use the teeth to open a portal. Fortunately I spotted it in time to hold back when she started asking where the portal was. I told her truthfully that I'd assumed it was going to be in the warehouse where we'd found the tooth creatures, and managed not to mention that we'd later found out where it really was.

Robin and Elizabeth had taken the more conventional route, arriving on Robin's bike, so as soon as I could I slipped off to the toilets and teleported to Adam and Michael to tell them what was up, giving them a bit of a surprise since they were in the van. Agnes was doing things to my mind. I only got the hang of the Voice of Tempation a few weeks ago and already I can do some pretty nasty stuff, and Agnes has had hundreds of years to practice. It was clear that we needed to try again to clear Robin's mind.

Adam's plan was to do it outside the ward. He was convinced that was what had interfered with the first attempt, and not total incompetence on my part, and it certainly wouldn't hurt. I teleported back into the toilets (definitely the best teleportation space) and went to find Robin and Elizabeth. Looking at the way Mary was behaving, I was starting to realise that something was off. I had a nasty suspicion she had also been affecting by Agnes's mind magic.

And of course Adam and Michael had managed to figure out what had killed the Whisper Sisters. What Michael had seen had been a ward washing over them. A strengthened ward, targeting the fae, doubtless in reaction to the tooth fairy being taken out of the ward. Agnes had done it.

By the time Robin arrived at the Premier Inn the hotel room was all set up for a magical intervention. And this time I didn't mess up. Adam made sure everything was set up properly. I knew what I was banishing. It was weird, being surrounded by the kind of religious iconography and not feeling immensely uncomfortable, but it was doing the job. Michael and Elizabeth got Robin into the right place and I pushed Agnes' influence right out of him.

And then we all had KFC, because if we were going to drive out all this way, we might as well.

Halcyon Calling, Episode 7: Faustus

I'd put some eyeliner on after I got out of the shower, and by the time I finished my online learning modules I was starting to feel a bit silly about it. But then I looked in the mirror and it actually looked totally badass so I left it on when I went out to meet the others.

I'd only been in the pub a couple of minutes when Billy and Balae showed up. They'd brought a couple of Billy's schoolfriends with them. Somehow I forgot Billy has friends other than me and Balae. Sanjit and Hugo. Sanjit seemed alright, if you didn't try to keep up with his high speed lecture on everything that's ever happened in the pub.

I didn't like Hugo. He started talking about my fingernails, which I didn't like, because I can't help it that they look like that and it only gets worse when I'm angry, and I tried to hide them under the table, but then he started in on my hair and eyes and I really wished I hadn't put that eyeliner on. I was trying really hard to keep my temper, but then he started asking why the others called me Honey Badger and I ended up snapping at him and it was a real struggle to just grab hold of him without crushing his hand. I think it was only because Balae showed up with drinks and I didn't want to spoil her first day at school any more after I'd already caused trouble on the bus.

Oh, and he asked me if I played rugby, which annoyed me because when they were trying to make me go to school people kept saying I should play rugby and then they let me try it and then I got in trouble for breaking the goal and I wasn't allowed to do it any more.

Still, at least Balae had had a good day, and she was very keen to go to the school disco and wanted me to go too. Which is probably allowed so long as I'm going with her. And Billy thinks it's a great idea and is sure he can find someone else to go with. So that's going to happen. Maybe Abeni will help me decide what to wear.

Someone managed to get rid of Hugo and Sanjit eventually. I asked Billy if Hugo's always that annoying and he told me he only pays that much attention to people he likes! So I just have to hope I scared him off when I almost lost it at him.

Me and Billy were going to have to stay over again if we were all going to sneak out together to meet Mrs Stodgely, which meant we needed an excuse. Billy told Castor and Pollux some story about not getting on with his dad. I'm not sure if he was telling the truth or not, but they bought it. And I didn't have to lie. I just reminded them that I didn't have anyone at home, and they understood.

We waited until the two of them were busy watching some awful old musical and went up to the roof. No way Splinters was going to miss us sneaking out of the door, so it had to be down the drainpipe. Balae floated down. Billy held onto my waist and I started climbing. Except the drainpipe was in worse shape than I remembered and started coming away from the wall. I was pretty sure I could just drop down and I'd be fine, but Billy could get really badly hurt, so I asked Balae to help. She made her arms really long and held the drainpipe long enough for me to get us both down safely.

We didn't have enough time to walk, but Billy had his bike, and Balae had one that she'd stolen! So she made herself very small so she could ride in my hair, and Billy and me rode out towards the meeting place. Which was going alright until we had to get across the river. We'd managed to dodge the Asterion peacekeepers on the streets, but the bridge was swarming with them. Billy knew about an access tunnel we could use instead, and found the entrance under one of those big commercial bins. So I pushed it out of the way, but it made a noise and attracted some thugs.

Except they weren't really thugs, because they looked really skinny, like they hadn't eaten in days, but that didn't really help because even if we wanted to give them our wallets we hadn't brought them. I asked if they'd rather we paid in peanuts or gum, which I don't think helped, and they threatened to call the peacekeepers. No way we could stop them, even with Billy managing to intimidate them with his psychic weaponry, so we were just going to have to be really fast and hope we were gone before they got back.

I don't think that manhole cover will ever be the same again but I did manage to get the bin back in place as we all climbed down. Yet another sewer. What a place to have a super sensitive nose. But now we had a clear route to the other side of the river. Or so we thought. We were about halfway across when we ran into two peacekeepers.

Nobody else around. Nobody to see what we were doing, and I'd been spoiling for a fight ever since I'd met Hugo, and now here were two of these bastards right in my way. It didn't matter that there were two of them and only one of me. Honey badger don't care. I knew the others had my back. And the only thing that I noticed through the blind rage is that one of them shot Billy with his arm blaster thing. His next shot hit me, which was awful, but it meant the others were OK and could knock out the other one. Then we saw the starfish starting to detach, just like in the pub, and it felt pretty great stamping on them.

We couldn't hang about. We had a meeting to get to. And when we got there it was the same warehouse we'd been to see Ariadne. Except this time instead of a load of blinding lights there was a candlelit dining table and music playing and some guy in a white suit. And Carmilla, of course.

I wasn't going to waste a free meal. It was some kind of fish, and there wasn't any ketchup, but it was still good. But I was still paying attention, and I've never seen anyone hate anyone as much as Mrs Stodgely seemed to hate Faustus. Except maybe how much Carmilla seemed to hate me.

Anyway, Mrs Stodgely wanted her husband fixed, and it seemed like Faustus could help with that. But he wanted her to work for him, and he called her Airy, or something, which she didn't seem to like. And he wanted all of us as well, to help destroy the bio factory in Elizabeth Park.

He asked us if we had any questions, but I just had one. Why us? And instead of answering he just spun a load of bullshit, so I asked if he thought I was stupid, and yeah, he does think I'm stupid. Just a hunk of muscle and claws. I'm starting to see why Mrs Stodgely hates him so much.

Then it was time to go, and we got a lift in an aerial vehicle so we didn't have to dodge peacekeepers. Carmilla was driving, and I'd been thinking. You don't hate someone as much as she hates me when you've never even met them. So maybe she had met me? I didn't remember her, but there's lots of things I don't remember. So when we got back to the pub and the others got out, I hung back a bit.

I told her I'd not really been in a good mood last time we met, which was true, and that it had been a while and we should catch up. And she knew straight away I didn't actually remember her, but that was enough to get her to talk. I'd already started to suspect, and when her whole jaw opened up in a mess of pedipalps I knew I was right. I wasn't the only person the survivalists were experimenting on. I guess when I didn't work out they had some other predators to try. No wonder she didn't eat anything in the warehouse. Although I don't see why she thinks I had it that much easier. I can eat normal food, but she can make herself look normal and pretty and I can never look like anything but what Faustus thinks I am.

So she'd been through all the same shit as me, but I didn't see why she had to be such a bitch about it. Until I got out of the AV and saw Billy and Balae, and remembered everything that happened on the way to the warehouse, and realised I do have something that she doesn't. Friends I can count on to have my back.