I don't often do the passing secret messages thing in my games, partly because it's a hassle. My GMing bag has index cards in, which I occasionally use, but writing legible messages means I have to pause the game briefly, which I don't like. Taking someone away from the table for a quick chat is just as inconvenient.
Gaming online has changed all that. Playing a game on Discord means sending a private message to another player is easy, and I type a lot faster than I write. Better still, it's not as obvious to the rest of the players that I'm sending them, as they can't see me physically writing on a card or taking someone aside, plus the game can keep going at the same time.
When I use secret messages, it's generally to create an atmosphere of unease. There's a bit in one of my scenarios where a PC is exposed to a drug. Other party members normally know it's happened, but I will often put the more specific effects in a secret message, giving that player a chance to roleplay some weird stuff while the rest of the players are trying to work out what's real.
They're also pretty important in a game like Alien (cinematic mode) where all the players have secrets and agendas that may conflict with other players. While in theory we should all be able to ignore OOC knowledge, in practice I think I would have found it a lot harder to play if I hadn't been able to secretly let the GM know that what I'm claiming to be doing is not at all what I'm actually doing.
I've played two Alien scenarios (Hope's Last Day and Chariot of the Gods) and have managed to kill the same guy's characters three times. Sorry Andy.
While in general I like everything out on the table so nobody misses out on anything, I think secret messages have their place in horror and horror-adjacent scenarios. So I guess those index cards are staying in the bag. But I'm thinking that for certain scenarios where I already know what secret messages I'm likely to need, I could speed things up a lot by printing them out in advance.
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