Friday, 29 November 2019

Diversity Hires, part 7: Roderick's Return

We decided it wasn't in anyone's best interest to know what happened to Kazgar, sticking to saying that he was gone. Which was technically accurate.

The crusade came to a temporary halt on the plains outside Altdorf, and we had a surprise visit from a gold wizard. He was very shiny. Burlok attempted to persuade him, with the full force of a dwarven miner's personality, to turn his beard gold. He declined. Frida reckoned that with some urine and camomile she could probably achieve something pretty similar. Burlok was not sold on that idea.

After some discussion and introductions, we got talking to one of the random team of guards who accompanied the wizard: an Estalian diestro by the name of Armando. There was quite a lot more to his name, but nobody could remember it.

Despite the fact that we were at this point supposed to be in custody after the recent mutant deaths, we convinced the higher ups that we should be sent to the city to arrange food to be sent out to the crusade. At last, we would be able to meet up with Roderick again. We made our way to the city gates, accompanied by Armando who was presumably following us mostly out of curiosity at this point.

We found Roderick in a pub, where we were able to get excellent beer and bread and very bad sausages. Mormacar enjoyed the spectacle of scantily clad men wrestling, while Frida complained that this was the first time she'd been disappointed by a sausage. Roderick himself was upstairs in a private area, guarded by a dwarf. After being bribed to let us in, the dwarf congratulated Burlok on being accompanied by 'so much vag'. We're not exactly sure who he was referring to.

We told Roderick of our adventures killing mutants and vampires, and convinced him that a general strip search for mutations of all important people on the crusade (important here defined as 'people with names') would be a good idea. After arranging for food deliveries and a brief shopping trip so Burlok could get the missing dwarf size pieces for his plate armour, we headed back to the camp.
The strip searching was a difficult sell, even with Mormacar entirely willing to undress himself, but we were distracted when we learned that Carl had gone missing. He was being taken away inside a coffin on a wagon, driven by a sorcerer and four hammer men.

The murder elves mounted their horses and rode to get ahead of the wagon. Frida, Burlok and Armando climbed onto Kazgar's wagon, and then remembered that Kazgar had been the only one who knew how to drive.

The sorcerer proved rather tricky to deal with, being apparently immune to conventional weapons, but Gildiril's magic missiles did work, and he began enchanting other people's weapons. Mormacar took a hit from some kind of magic rifle that left him close to death, but fortunately the sorcerer abandoned it after one shot and stunned Gildiril instead.

The hammer men proved significantly more vulnerable to Frida's tiny rocks, and shooting one of the horses in the leg effectively stopped the wagon. So we leave our party here, around a stationary wagon with Karl the scion of Sigmar/totally a demon stuck in a coffin, with a sorcerer to fight and a horde of cultists (probably) emerging from the gates of Altdorf. Will they survive long enough to actually make it to their next careers? Find out next time on Slightly Less Diversity Hires Now There's A Human.

No comments:

Post a Comment